¬My greatest fear¬

I've been thinking about this for quite some time now. I must say that this is a tough question >.< My dad suggested that i should write abt my fear of the dark. I mean, that was like, when i watched this horror flick and din dare look in any reflective objects n ran to sleep with my sister -.-lll Ok, maybe i did that yesterday. But i was reading a scary book! Stupid Royce, forced me 2 borrow it n scared me =.=

Okay, maybe my greatest fear IS being afriad of the dark. But it's not. There's something else, but i really can't say it here. After watching ytd's movie, Apocalypse, during tuanqi (I brought Sandy), I had this fear that when we are faced with the rapture, and when i'm in heaven (I have the faith!), the people whom i see down there are my loved ones, that's my greatest fear. I fear that my loved ones would not get to know about this magnificient God, the ONLY God, in time.

So i have decided, to try to get my friends to attend Tuanqi. That's the first step. I hope i can make a difference... no. I MUST make a difference (I have faith!). In order to save my friends, i have to do it. Even if they hate me in the end, I know that i've done my part. I was overcome with emotion at the end of the show, altho the beginning was abit luo shuo. I was happy that i brought one person a step closer to God. And the good thing is, she's coming next week! Together with Jeanell's friend, KX, aka Fiona. whee¬¬ That's double happiness. I hope i can get more people to come...

["Behold, I am coming soon! My reward is with me, and I will give to everyone according to what he has done.] Revelation 22:12
[The spirit and the Bride say, "Come!" And let him who hears say, "Come!" Whoever is thirsty, let him come;and whoever wishes, let him take the free gift of the water of life.] Revelation 22:17
[The grace of the Lord Jesus be with God's people. Amen.] Revelations 22:21

~Listening 2 dis song when i'm sad somehow makes me feel worse~

h:如何帮哥哥找个女友这是个动脑筋任务
r:要是人太高份人太蠢我亦转身就逃
k:其实没预料未来女友
ch:肥定瘦高与矮计不到
ch:我喜爱是哪种始终我未答到无谓来令我难做
c+r:想她有迷人卖相c:唱歌声线悦耳明亮
k:很可爱但我夹不上合:有双手也未拍得响
cr:哥哥点算好(k:随意两个字)
cr:应该要立志(w:何以紧张不已)
cr:我担心你又呆望永不讲爱意(ch:其实清楚心中爱意)
错失一次然后了事(ch:错失一次还未透支)
r:请精挑细选(ch:还要夹八字)
c:为何还是无意(ch:明你的好意)
cr:关心紧你先帮帮手拣女友
(ch:都不心急拣女友)但你在等在误时
(ch:或我隆重地草拟)要是欠诚意(ch:若然未合意)
怕没有人会钟意(ch:自然便没有在意)
c:时常惊哥哥拣错女友我亦会是切身受害会被人夺走弄权在手变做了阶下囚
ch:如若是属实未来女友常令你心里悲会追究
k:我都怕令你忧我所以未挽手
ch:无谓来令你难受
h+r:只不过闲聊地说你不必要为我迟误
ch:只不过没法去兼顾有好感也害怕辛苦(cr:有好感你别怕辛苦)
c+r:有没有诚意(ch:未情投合意)
盼望竭尽你心思(ch:尽人事难道满意)

This song's in cantonese. Too bad i can't put it on the blog 4 u guys 2 listen. Nat said the girl's 12 n the boy's 14 when they sang the song. Pro lar. NAT I MISS U!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ='( And i shared my deadliest secret wif her sum mor. XD
Gtg dry my eyes.

~lvl 5 perfect x7~

I went 2 dad's new office 2day! Woa, President sia... Dad bought Mac meal 4 me, so sweet, lols. Den gt tuanqi at 4pm. Din noe was supposed 2 play the piano. Took arnd 3mins 2 practise?

After singing, Esther welcomed the tuanqi people, as it's Soar's opening ceremony. Then we had to write a summary on the past year, and our resolutions for this year and share with the tuanqi members.

Aft that was the best part; Prayer Session. Me, being this year's group leader, had to lead the Prayer session for my group. So CP was like, "What are we doing now?" And i got a shock cuz i didn't know what to do... Then i thought as fast as i could and came up with,
"Erm, we shall start by having each member share the events that happened this week. So let's start with... Titia."
Titia: "But i haven't think yet leh!"
"Ok.. then let's start with Benjamin."
CP: "Why don't you start?"
"I can't, cuz it's kinda sad, and i don't wanna spoil everyone's mood so fast. So, Benjamin, what happened in your week?"
Benjamin, being the youngest in our tuanqi, was very shy, and only responded when we asked him questions, and never looked up. I can understand how you feel (:

So everyone had their turn and when it was mine, i just kinda poured out what happened this week. Oh damn, i forgot to tell them abt the slipping from the steps part! Sigh. I left out many holes here and there. Don't want to make it sound TOO sad you know. And i told them to pray for Nat.

"Ok, let us now pray for the person on our right.... no, the left... aiya, right la right la. Then i will make the ending prayer."

-After prayer-
CP: "Wow, you were good. I never spoke as much chinese when praying as you did. Keep it up! (dunno if he said the last sentence -.-)"

Then Titia and Noelle took over, as they were in-charge of the games. I'm proud to say that i'm proud of them. Lol.. I mean, seriously. They did a good job, organising the games and all. The first game was fun, with lots of laughter, but the second game was the best. I was like, laughing throughout the game la. It's got loads to do with arm linking and running. Damn fun.

It's a real pity to be unable to get my friends to come to tuanqi. I really, really want you guys to come. You know how difficult it is to get people to come?

Just to let you know that one of my resolutions is "To get my friends to come to tuanqi, and hopefully, our church."

~When will i see you again? When will we share precious moments..~

This week's been long, tiring and tumulous. Like a hurricane. Ok, fine. It can't be like a hurricane cuz it's.. ok nvm. Many things happened lately; things which have not been in my favour. I'm just too sad to say it out. Well wadever.

Fell down 1 1/2 times. How fortunate. My butt still hurts from the fall. 1st time was when me Royce n YP wer walkin down the steps from the schl hall. Raining mah, so the steps damn slippery. I was talkin 2 them abt smth folding arms, den suddenly i stepped on the edge of the step n the next thing i knew, i was sliding from the top of the step 2 the bottom. In my skirt. My WHITE COLOURED SKIRT. Damnit. Thank God YP saved me. He was near 2 the bottom of the step, n wen i slided past him, he grabbed my arm. THANKS YP! ^^

Den my leg got blood. I didn't really care. My mind was somewhere else, deep in thought about other things. That's what you get for thinking when walking down a flight of slippery steps.

2nd time was from CC's hse, at night. Was walking down her front door wen i lost my footing n nearly fell on my butt. But due to my lightning reflexes, i managed 2 grab the gate in time, which prevented me from falling lah.

I have this overwhelming feeling that's hard to explain. The word could be 'elated', but my feelings are much stronger than that. These few days have been the happiest days of my life. Or should i say, Life! I'm just too lost for words. Serious! Ever since Wednesday. And i realized that i have a very special friend, who always made me happy (: Can't say who, but whee~~~ Thanks so much for making me smile.

Although... Something unexpected happened on Friday. I bet THOSE PEOPLE are talking behind my back. I can so feel it. Maybe my mind is playing tricks on me. Then again, they're supposed to be my friends, so maybe they're not as bad as they seem?

AARGH, I JUST REMEMBERED! I'm in band 1 for humans!!!!!!!! AAAAARRRRGGHHHHH thanks, nana n ian 4 reminding me WHEEE~~~ Another thing to feel happy about XD

OKAYYY Enough of happy (and abit of sad) talk.

Today, we did a personality test. Again. And i realized that i've changed, from the previous test i took, which was only one month away. Wow, i changed so fast...
-pauses for 17mins 2 chat~

Time flies. Time really flies. And i'm missing you already.

~1st day of school. What can i say?~

Seating arrangement changed, people's hairstyle changed, school handbook changed (looks nicer) but one thing's never changed; OUR STUPID CLASSROOM. We are using our same classroom as last year. Expected lah. And for these 4 years, we've been studying at the SAME LEVEL. What a bore!

Guess what, this year's sec 1s need to tuck in!!! LOLOLOLOLOL it's not as if i've known this only today, but it just seems so funny, seeing it with my own eyes. WOOHOOHOOHOO WAHAHAHAHA, ok, i'm being cruel. But who cares, BAHAHAHAHAAAAaaa

Mdm Neo made her ultra long speach, zzzzzzz. Ms Lee kept looking at me cuz i kept talking to Bernice. Puh lease lor. As if no one else is talking -.-

Oh yea, our form teacher changed as well, or rather, form teachers. Woo n Lee. Ok la. But Woo is... somehow, weird to be our form teacher. I kinda miss Loo... And he still wrote this touching letter to me! Sighh, but i'm still gonna see him during training, and demand my rightful CCA points XP

Yay, recieved some presents today whee~~ And nearly got sent to the stage cuz of my 'long' hair... Den sway sway kena spotted by Cheong. Eee, so embarrasing can.
Nat is soo funny, we were sooo crazy during lessons! HJ n YP also, as usual lah, hahaa ^^

So happy to see some of the old teachers teaching us, but i feel sad that some are leaving =(

~Love is the greatest gift of all~

Wow, time really flies. I can't believe i've been blogging for 4 years now. 2006 was a rough year, with many rises and falls. Kinda like a rollercoaster ride. I learnt knew stuff, got more emotional, learnt how to feel what people feel, and discovered my talents. Best of all, I learnt more about God and our purpose in life.

However, I became lazy, always doing stuff esp revising at the last minute. And my temper took over me many times, at home and with friends. I must apologize.

Many people think that i'm always happy, but they are wrong. they are SO darn wrong. I may seem happy, smiling, cracking jokes almost all the time, being lame as usual. But my sole purpose is to make the people around me happy. That's the least i could do. But deep down inside, i'm a sad person, lost and alone maybe, but basically sad.

No one has seen me cry before. None of my friends, none of my churchmates. Only God and my family members. Sometimes you bottle everything inside you, and once it gets too full it will explode. That's what happened. It happened before, it might happen again. Maybe typing this out will make me feel better. Maybe.

I found out that reading the Bible calms me down, and it assures me that whenever i feel hopeless and down, someone is always there to comfort me, even though I cant see Him. Not physically, but we can feel Him spiritually.

OK enough confessions. gtg eat.

PS 金枝欲孽 makes its debut on chnl U at 10pm. I've watched it already, and i like Maggie Cheung's character in the show.

Good news, I completed my A maths ws yesterday! Woo~~ And D** has not even started. XP

Then played Audition. In the morning Titia called to ask if she could come up to play, but i've not downloaded it yet. Then dad came back and allowed me to download it ^^ Oh ya, she might be comin later to play. Zp said "lame" well, wadever lah =P

Ytd night competed wif 4 lvl 5 gals, and i beat them all!! And yet i was only a mere lvl 2 noob! Somemore i achieved Perfect X6 lar. Shiok shiok. SY said it gets boring aft awhile. I guess that will be true.

2moro's the day which i dread the most. But i also look forward to meeting my friends again. So 矛盾 haha...

Happy new year everyone. Was thinking of putting more Sikkim pics in my previous post, but it takes time for it to load, so i thought the better of it. This is 2007. I hope it's gonna be better than the previous year cuz i didn't really do as well as i expected. Partly it was due to my lazyness/laziness. In sec 1, i got pretty satisfying results. In sec 2, it started to drop. I know the reason, besides being lazy. I know WHAT caused me to be like that. I'm trying to change.

I hope sec 4 isn't as worse as sec 3, although i doubt it. But anyways, look on the bright side... um, is there even a bright side to look forward to???